Secret Lives Makes a Comeback

mother and daughter playing in green fieldThe year was 1989 and I was about to be published for the first time. I was at the notoriously exciting Washington Romance Writers conference in Harpers Ferry, West Virginia where  I gave a workshop on Innovative Characterization Techniques, something I still teach, albeit with modifications. Back then, I identified myself as a psychotherapist and still had my private practice, since I hadn’t yet made a dime off writing. (Not quite true. I’d made $150 for an op-ed piece published in the Los Angeles Times and I’d received an advance on my two book contract, less my agent’s 15%.  So as of that conference, I’d made $4,400 and wasn’t exactly ready to quit my day job. Nor did I want to. I loved my work).  But getting back to the conference.

I wasn’t nervous as I presented that workshop even though the audience was quite large. I’d been making presentations for years as a social worker and felt at home “on stage”. When I went to bed the night after my workshop, I was happy and relaxed. When I got up the next morning, though, anxiety hit with a vengeance. Why? That morning I was going to have an event writers both crave and fear: a pitch meeting with an editor.

I was now contractless after turning in my second book, but I had an idea for a third that I was completely, utterly, head-over-heels in love with. I also had a problem: I was, and frankly still am, a terrible pitcher. I can never seem to sum up my stories in a neat package for an agent or an editor or even for a reader. I’d rehearsed what I would say, though, and was as ready as I could be.

   I waited in the ballroom for my appointment and soon it was my turn. The editor (I have absolutely no memory of who she was) and I met on the long glassed-in porch that runs along the side of the old Hilltop House where the conference was held. We sat across from one another at a small cloth-covered table overlooking the spectacular view of the rivers. Harpers Ferry is where the Shenandoah River and the Potomac River come crashing together. It’s one of my favorite places. But looking over the cliff from our table, I felt a wave of nausea.

   I began pitching.

   “It’s called Secret Lives and it’s the story of a young woman named Eden, she’s an actress, who wants to make a movie about her mother, who was a famous children’s author. She was odd. Her mother, I mean. Her name was Kate and she lived in a cavern, like the Luray Caverns near here, because she was agoraphobic. Or not agoraphobic exactly, but. . . Well, anyway, Eden wants to humanize her, make her sympathetic. But she has to live with her aunt and uncle while she’s researching her mother’s life and she hates them because something happened when she was living with them when she was a teenager. . . ”

Here, I had to pause because I was having some sort of panic attack. I couldn’t seem to breathe properly. I was swallowing in all the wrong places and the words sounded strangled as they rushed of my mouth. The editor was smiling kindly at me, nodding her head a little, but I could tell she was not catching my passion. I continued.

“But now the uncle is an archaeologist in the Shenandoah Valley and he has a partner, Ben, who Eden falls for, but Ben’s been convicted of molesting his daughter, but he swears he’s innocent and. . . ”

   Again I stopped. This time I was so freaked out that I had to excuse myself and get a glass of water, which I brought back to the table. “I’m sorry,” I said. “I seem to have something caught in my throat.” Like, the story, I thought. It wasn’t coming out right at all.

   “No problem,” said the kind editor.

   “I forgot to mention the journal! The uncle has the mother, Kate’s,  journals and they tell the story of her life, and–”

   “I’m afraid we’re out of time,” the editor said–words I’d said many times myself to my therapy clients. “I have another appointment.” She leaned toward me and spoke sincerely. “I can tell you love this story and that it means a lot to you on a personal level, but I think it’s too complex for the sort of book I’m looking for right now. Maybe you could simplify it, although I really don’t think it’s for us either way.”

Drat.  I’d blown my chance, plus made a fool out of myself in the process. When I told my agent about my failed appointment, she said I would have to write the whole book on spec. There was no other way, because every time I tried to describe the complexities of the story that were so clear in my mind, I failed, even with her.

So that’s what I did. I wrote the entire five hundred pages on the weekends and in the mornings before I headed off to work. I started with Kate’s journal, writing her story in first person, my heart breaking for her the whole time. I wrote her entire journal first so that I didn’t lose her voice. Living inside her head, I became so close to her that I could hardly bear to let her go.

Then I created Eden’s story, and Ben’s, and I filled them up with a complicated blend of love and anger toward Eden’s aunt and uncle. Yes, the characters’ stories were complex. I gave them a hundred and one obstacles to happiness. Then I threw them all together in the Shenandoah Valley and let them work it out.

   When I was finished, my agent sent the manuscript to Karen Solem, who was then an editor at HarperCollins, and I had my offer the next day. Karen saw what I saw in the book but had been unable to express to that editor in Harpers Ferry: a story too complex to easily describe, but not too complex to fall in love with.

I had a very small readership when Secret Lives came out in 1991. It sold a few copies in hardcover and a few more in paperback. Then it quietly disappeared, as so many books do. Although my current publisher is doing a nice job of reissuing my older books, Secret Lives and some of my very early books may never get to see the light of day again unless I take action myself. So that’s why I’ve arranged to publish Secret Lives in an electronic format. I apologize to those of you who prefer print. Creating an e-book is an inexpensive, relatively easy experiment. Self publishing in print is another matter, one I’m not yet ready to tackle. (You may be able to find old print copies of Secret Lives on ebay or used on Amazon or other Internet booksellers). If you are an electronic book reader, I hope you’ll try a free sample of Secret Lives on your Kindle or any other E-reader. And please let me know what you think. I’m sure you know by now that it’s one of my favorite books. Just don’t ask me to describe it to you!


  1. Debbie hearne on July 5, 2010 at 7:35 am

    I love how you share yourself with others! I remember your experience in Starbucks as you worked on this and understand your emotions! You become attached to your characters and give them LIFE! I am so fortunate to have a copy of this book because my grief therapist (Pam) gave it to me. It is a wonderful book. I am so happy that you were able to bring it back via e-book! I love all your books and I love you Diane Chamberlain!

  2. Diane Chamberlain on July 5, 2010 at 10:40 am

    Thank you, Debra. I’m so grateful to your therapist for giving you a copy of SL. (and for being such a big help to you!)

  3. Margo on July 5, 2010 at 12:07 pm

    Diane, I never realized what you went through just to have SECRET LIVES published!…it must have been terrifying sitting across from that editor and trying to sell her a beautiful story that she just didn’t seem to get…grrrrrrr
    it was her loss Diane…good things came out of your hard work by putting it all down on paper…I love the book and I know how much it means to you…with the fact that Mira is reprinting some of your earlier novels, is there a chance they would reprint this one?…your readers would love it.

  4. Betty Savage on July 5, 2010 at 12:21 pm

    I am blessed to have a hardback copy of Secret Lives, another of your books that I reread each year. I found it through Amazon, I think. Thank you for not giving up on your stories.

  5. Brenda on July 5, 2010 at 12:38 pm

    Great of you to share.
    I think that you are going to get a new audience on e books. I saw so many people using them in the airports. I know that I want one of these Ipads within a year. Order e books and do Internet and email and avoid carrying the laptop. Fantastic thing. Yes, we like our books but the new generation will love the e book.

  6. Diane Chamberlain on July 5, 2010 at 2:12 pm

    Margo, Mira doesn’t have the rights to my early books (Private Relations, Lovers and Strangers, Secret Lives, Fire and Rain, The Escape Artist, Reflection, Brass Ring). They would have to buy the rights from me, but there’s no reason for them to do that until they’ve reissued the older ones they DO have the rights to. Make sense? If people seem to want my older books in electronic format, I can make that happen. Will wait and see how this great experiment goes!

  7. Margo on July 5, 2010 at 4:22 pm

    Maybe once Mira has reissued all the one’s they do have rights to they’ll be interested in buying the others from you Diane…SECRET LIVES
    of course, but also FIRE AND RAIN was an amazing story…and REFLECTION was my friend Laura’s very favorite…it was the only book she ever read that as soon as she read the last sentence, she turned around and read the book all over again…she loved, loved, loved it…hope these earlier ones might be a possibility someday…until then, e-books are great for the new generation.

  8. Margo on July 5, 2010 at 4:33 pm

    I’m happy to say that I have all these books in print Diane…with 1 exception, LOVERS & STRANGERS…otherwise I’ve read all your novels and have them on my ‘Diane Shelf’.
    PRIVATE RELATIONS I believe was your 1st novel and I really loved it…I still remember the big fireplace in the Chapel House with Kit and all the others sitting around the warmth of the fire and enjoying friendship…if I recall there might have been a couple of Golden Retrievers in the book too…maybe I’m confusing that with another story…at any rate, what a fantastic book.

  9. Rob Lopresti on July 6, 2010 at 10:05 am


    SECRET LIVES is still my favorite of your books. (BAY is a close second). And I like the new cover.


  10. Brenda on July 6, 2010 at 10:58 am

    I also love Secrets and one of my favorite is Bay. However the trilogy remains my all time favorite with Bay close second

  11. Diane Chamberlain on July 6, 2010 at 11:22 am

    Thanks, Rob. I made the cover myself. It was fun once I figured out what I was doing.

  12. Margo on July 6, 2010 at 1:17 pm

    Brenda, the trilogy is fantastic…I think everyone knows by now that KEEPER OF THE LIGHT is my favorite novel of all time…I loved SECRET LIVES and treasure my hardbound copy.

  13. Patricia McLinn on July 9, 2010 at 5:38 pm

    Pitches. Hate, hate, hate them. If I could tell the darned story in five minutes, I wouldn’t have written a book!

    I had notecards for my 1st pitch — at a WRW meeting, about 5 months before that Retreat you described. My hands trembled. My voice was 2 octaves higher than usual. The editor who said yes, send the complete, left the publishing house the day after receiving my ms (not my fault, honest!) I was very fortunate she passed it to another editor. An editor change two days after they received my submission — a portent!

    Uh-oh. Now I’m going to have retroactive nightmares.

  14. Joann on July 15, 2010 at 4:18 pm

    Yes I am Diane’s sister. But putting that aside Secret Lives is my all time favorite of her books and I read them all. I never read books twice because somewhere along the line I think I remember what’s going to happen next. But I made an exception for this one. I love these characters and I have absolutely no problem walking in their footsteps.
    And I can picture that cave perfectly. I do hope you’ll all read it, I know you won’t be disappointed. Joann

  15. Regina on July 30, 2010 at 1:27 am

    Dear Diane,
    I am a translator from a small Baltic country of Lithuania. This summer I had an extremely great pleasure to read your book “The Secret Life of CeeCee Wilkes” and translate it into Lithuanian. It was not difficult at all, but I so much got captured by the reality of the book and lived with its characters, that by the end of it I was sad I had to close on the last page. I liked the novel very much, I was fascinated by its sincerity and closeness to life. I hope the book in Lithuania will come out sometime by the end of the year and I dearly hope our readers will certainly like it.
    Diane, I’m so happy this week I’ve got two more of your books to work with, I mean to translate into Lithuanian. They are “Before the Storm” and “Secrets She Left Behind”. So it would be nice if we could keep in touch, I’ll let you knoe how it goes. Good luck to you.
    My love,

    • Diane Chamberlain on July 30, 2010 at 9:15 am

      Regina, I’m so happy to hear from you! I’m delighted that I’m now being published in Lithuania. Thank you for doing the translations of my books. I hope the Lithuanian readers love them. If you’d like to keep in touch, please do so through my email address or the most recent post on the blog, because I sometimes don’t notice posts on older blog entries. My email address is


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