A Most Shocking Day

shockSerious kudos to the Mayo Clinic.

This place operates with a sort of efficiency I’ve never before experienced. I had three tests scheduled today. One at 7:30, another at 10:30, another at 1:30. That’s a lot of waiting between tests. When I finished my 7:30 test, I went to the area where the 10:30 would be given to see if I could possibly be taken in earlier. Sure! Why not? I was out of there by 9:30. That worked so well, I zipped over to the 1:30 appointment to see if I could make the magic happen again. I was in and out by 10:30, back to the hotel and napping by 11, with all test results already in the computer and winging their way to my doctor. Unreal. Then John and I went out for a leisurely lunch and an afternoon of hanging out with the Midwife. (Yes, we’re both hanging out with the midwife. John’s reading the manuscript as I edit).

For those of you yelling at me because I’m working while here, I need to set you straight. Being able to work is joy for me. First, I get to lose myself in the world of people who are ever so much more screwed up than I am.  🙂  Second, I love writing. It’s that simple.

My first test today was an EMG, which I bet a bunch of you have had, followed by that stick-needles-in-your-muscles test, the correct name of which I’ve forgotten and which is not as bad as it sounds. I’ve learned my iPod is my friend during those two tests. For the first, I listened to oldies, but the technician scolded me for tapping my toes in time to the music, so for the second, I switched to my mindfulness meditation music, sung by the beautiful Anh Huong Nguyen, whom I know from the Mindfulness Center in Oakton, Virginia. Perfect. I barely felt a thing.

Second test involved more “sweat” stuff (they are very into sweat here), although this time I didn’t actually have to sweat, thank goodness. That was followed by some breathing tests, which were followed by 5 minutes on the tilt table. Five minutes was enough. I really am not sure why being strapped to a table set 90 degrees to the floor was so icky feeling, but it was. I’ve heard that people with serious fainting problems, which I fortunately do not have, have to spend about 45 minutes on the tilt table. I would rather go back in the oven.

The final test of the day involved a really big needle that I don’t want to think about, so we’ll move right along!  I just checked the instructions for tomorrow’s test. Here they are:

a) Be sure to get a good night’s sleep the night before the test.

b) Do not take any sleep aid, pain medications, alcohol or tranquilizers the night before the test.

I don’t know about you, but I don’t think “a” is going to be possible for me without a little bit of “b” tonight.

On another note, I’m almost finished Geraldine Brooks’ absolutely amazing People of the Book, so any suggestions for what I should read next on my Kindle are most welcome!


  1. Kathleen Neavill on August 4, 2010 at 8:00 pm

    Sounds like they are trying to find Jimmy Hoffa! Just kidding. Hope it is over soon with good results. Being from Wisconsin, I know how nice that area is. I was born in the northern part in Rhinelander, a place of many lakes and trees. Good luck.

  2. Melissa Foster on August 4, 2010 at 9:45 pm

    Hi Diane,

    I’m glad you made it through your tests okay. Just thought I’d let you know that Megan’s Way is available on Kindle:-)



  3. Krysia on August 4, 2010 at 10:06 pm

    Sounds like a fun filled day, ok maybe not. Hope you get the answers you need. You should check out some of the sites before you leave, take in the midwest and the fresh air. If you really want an adventure the Spam museum is about 45 min away! I’ve never been there, it was 3 am when I pasted Austin but did get to see the jolly Green Giant in Blue Earth.

  4. Anne Butcher on August 5, 2010 at 4:22 am

    Whew!!! What a day. Makes my insomnia so lame. I would hate the sweat test most! Can’t be hot. Got to believe the tests are worse than the results. Mayo is the best place you can be. Glad you had an afternoon and totally understand the need to work. This will make “Midwife” even more special. Sending you gentle breezes!

  5. debbie hearne on August 5, 2010 at 7:57 am

    I’m cracking up over the turkey pic and the shocking photo! Love your sense of humor and love you!

  6. Gina on August 5, 2010 at 8:31 am

    Diane, thanks so much for keeping us updated. Your fans care about you. Hope you get some good answers and a safe trip back home.

    Try reading Year of Pleasures by Elizabeth Berg. I think you might like it.

    Take Care ((hugs))

  7. Margo on August 5, 2010 at 11:11 am

    Hopefully the worst is over for you Diane…you are SO brave my friend…and I think it’s WONDERFUL that you took MIDWIFE with you…not only is writing your passion, but she is keeping you company and hopefully taking your mind off the ‘oven’, etc.
    Wish you were on vacation & not having tests…we are only about 8 hours South of you in the neighboring State of Iowa.
    Would have had you & John for an outdoor barbeque (not ‘OVEN’ food) if you had the time to zip down to visit.
    As it is, I’m sure you’re anxious to get home.

  8. Joann on August 5, 2010 at 3:50 pm

    We read “People of the Book” in my book club and I thought it was wonderful. No matter what I read I always come back to historical fiction as my favorite. I don’t know if she’s written anything else, that might be a good thing to find out. Sending you lots of cool thoughts even though it’s 93 hear today. I’m so glad you have john with you, he’s a treasure. Jo

  9. brenda on August 5, 2010 at 5:34 pm

    I understand the working on the book…I take work with me wherever-school work…have already spent two days in my classroom…before I go to my last trip…As to the tests-I think the worst were when I had one of the major strokes-in my 20’s…had had other surgeries–including hysterectomy-already…the EEG, EKG, etc. etc. The kidney test-to determine damage there-that was the worst-but again, my friend, I don’t know how you managed the heat test. What a great idea to listen to music…will do that during my next tests-when my Dr. can get me to have any…be glad of John and good insurance…you are a brave woman…

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